You’ve seen the Texts from Last Night thing, right? It’s a collection of texts that should have never been sent, but for our own entertainment, we’re so glad those people hit the send button.
Our group doesn’t have those texts. Instead, throughout the night I keep a running list in my phone of fantastic things that were said. Everyone is getting really good at it, because now as soon as something is said, someone will look at me and say, “Write that shit down!” to make sure I got it. Therefore, we have quotes from last night.
These quotes don’t necessarily fit into a topic of any sorts except the general heading of Funny Ass Shit.
The even funnier thing about them is that most were said when we weren’t even drinking. That’s right, our obscene talent is ingrained in us and no alcohol is even needed to bring it to the surface. Just put us all together and it naturally starts erupting.
Now, this first one, it wouldn’t have been near as funny if a female had said it.
I shit you not. Those words came from his mouth and he even waved his finger in the air as he said it.
Sometimes, we find ourselves thanking God for those unanswered prayers.
Thank ya Jesus for not making me Sandy. Here’s to all my fellow pink ladies.
Often, tough decisions have to be made.
Ours are always judged on the scale of pimpness.
We talk about people too. A lot. I mean, we did grow up in a small southern farm town, what the hell else are we supposed to do?
Now, if you’re from the South, you know good and well that statement right there explains the quirkiness of some people we’ve encountered. Don’t deny that shit.
Sometimes, the booze spirit takes us over.
The wall humping may or may not have taken place during Aretha Franklin’s Freeway of Love. I mean what other song would you hump a wall to?
Also, you should expect further Quotes from Last Night installments.
Happy Freak Show Friday.
Read more Freak Show Fridays and Stories Here.
Jenna, you girls (I can say that cause I’m old) are bad. You are so cute. And that sassy husband of yours, cauute. Keep on having fun. Luv ya.
We are bad. I’ll admit it and own it. 😉 It’s more fun that way! haha!
I love you jenna; you’ve got it going on! You do fly your freak flag. Keep it coming.
haha! Thanks, Michele!
OMG, you always make me laugh, Jenna! Hilarious post! Keep ’em comin’!
Happy to be of service, Sarah! 😉
Jenna I look forward to you every morning ! I had to LOL about the She’s from the North quip..I HAVE SAID THAT BEFORE !!
Keep ’em comin’ Girlfriend !
MERRY CHRISTMAS
I couldn’t count how many times I’ve said that and as one other person commented – you know those northerners say the same about us! haha!
What a fun group, I’m sure ya’ll just have the best time. You really should run a recorder so you can listen to these get togethers years down the road.
I have videos of our pool parties and football parties from when my 1st husband and I lived in Florida and every once in a blue moon I will watch one and sit here by myself and laugh my ass off. When I watch one of those videos it is hard to believe that my first husband is dead because he was so full of life and so funny, but anyway you don’t think about these little get togethers as special but they are, so I always encourage people to video or record these times because years from now you can watch or listen and laugh like you had never heard it before and when the circus is old enough she can listen or watch and laugh and enjoy as much as you and grunt, they become very special times.
Oh that would be so fun, Patty! We have a few videos we’ve taken with our phones, but not long ones or anything like that! You’re right – they would be treasures!
She’s from the North! bahahahaha, for real! HOW many times have I said that??? I love my Northern friends, but bless their hearts, you know they say the same about us!
Oh they most definitely do!
You so make me laugh! Thank goodness I’m southern!
hahaha!!! Indeed, Kathy!
I love these posts! They hit home. ????
haha! Here’s to fellow freaks! 🙂
A day without Jenna is a day without sunshine 🙂 Those were great. However….you still have “I’m sorry I molested Jesus’ hair” right up there on the number 1 spot!!!
hahahaha!!! Oh honey, I don’t know if any of us can ever beat that quote!